Marriage from a Woman's View

Today's Advice is about Temperance
We as women are naturally designed to have and show emotions. When it comes to nurturing a child or even our spouses feelings over different trivial things we have to render a hug and a smile. However, when Life throws so many things at you, when bills become an Issue, and your Faith is tried we tend to get UPSET. Our Upset turns into Anger and if its not handle it can turn into rage. Personally I have had issues in this area, growing up I never was good at dealing with Large amounts of stress. Anyone who approached me was liable to get cussed out, and their feelings hurt. When I gave my life to Christ that had to change. It was hard in the beginning for me because I met so many people who were naturally nasty towards me and I had to tell myself to be quiet. Although this is a hard task to learn it can be learned. When it comes down to your Spouse it is a task that is required, you wont always see eye to eye on everything, but the response you give can affect you both.




Today's Advice is about TRUST 

 Trust-noun reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence. Trust always seems to be one of the leading reasons why marriage's don't work besides finances. Many of us have had gruesome horror stories of relationships from the past that causes us at times to second guess, regret, or be fearful of the current spouse we are with. I won't profess to be a Marriage Guru, but I can share somethings that helped me when I was dealing with trust in my own marriage.

 T-Truth -When I was in the dating stage of all my past relationships I didn't feel as if I had an obligation to be perfect. Many times if my boyfriends asked where I was or who I was on the phone with I would lie and say a girlfriend especially if I had other guy friends. When I first got married I found myself remembering all those lies I told, and began to falsely accuse my husband. Everytime he was on the phone I told myself he gotta be talking to another female, if I called him and he didnt answer right away I accussed him of cheating. I had to realize that I was the one with the problem, and I had to accept why I felt that way. Upon doing that I had to counsel myself through prayer and fasting.

 R-Reality -It's so easy to get wrapped up in a childhood fantasy of being swept away by your long awaited King. I have been around many women who hold their marriage to a standard ignoring the Reality of Life. I told myself I don't ever want to be that woman who 20 years down the line, wind up sitting in front of a marriage counselor or a divorce lawyer, not knowing when it all went wrong. Marriage is about learning one another, and accepting the good and the bad, the like and dislike of your husband.

 U-Understanding -To Understand, means to know, and in order to know you have to Listen. It seems so unfair at times when your talking to your spouse and you ask for a response and you dont get one. However when he wants to chat and talk your required to be engaged. lol I have experienced this quite a few times in my own marriage, I have now realized that life is not fair, but Love is worth fighting for. I had to teach my husband what I liked and disliked, and if he wanted me to listen he had to listen.

 S-Stand -After you've done all you can, you just Stand. Situations are only temporary, no matter how hard it gets you have to remember why you did it in the first place and STAND on that.

 T-Triumph -to gain mastery; prevail: When you combine everything you have learned about TRUST you obtain Victory. Knowing that your spouse is your soul mate, and Love drew you both together should become your barrier when the Storms in your life Rage. Marriage is not perfect, but it is a beautiful thing to work towards perfection in. If TRUST is an issue in your own marriage evaluate your Y, be optimistic, and move forward!